Ya Think, Newt Gingrich?

Newt Gingrich said what anybody with eyeballs and earballs already knows about the Orange Don’s empty promise to “drain the swamp” in Washington, DC. It bears repeating, though:

“I’m told [Trump] now just disclaims [draining the swamp]. He now says it was cute, but he doesn’t want to use it anymore.”

duh

Judging by the long list of millionaires and billionaires that donated to the sociopathic orangutan’s campaign and now have plum Cabinet positions, we’d say you’re right, Newt! Of course, he’s since walked back that claim, because he wants to be part of that swamp, pretty please!

Photo Credits: GiphyGiphy

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Ya Think, Ben Carson?

Former Republican presidential candidate and noted sleep-talker, Dr. Ben Carson, dropped a bombshell a couple of days ago: he’s not interested in being a member of President-Elect Camacho’s cabinet. The reason is even more hilarious and insightful than you might expect. From The Hill:

“[According to Dr. Carson’s friend and advisor Armstrong Williams], ‘Dr. Carson feels he has no government experience, he’s never run a federal agency. The last thing he would want to do was take a position that could cripple the presidency.'”

We wanna defend Sleeping Benny here, but we couldn’t find the lie. And don’t you guys even think about asking the obvious question of why the fuck he ran for PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES in the first place if he knew he was grossly unqualified. Not only is it a little too on the nose, but it’s rude as hell to wake a dude when he’s sleeping.

ben carson

Photo Credits: Giphy, Giphy