Bless Your Heart: The Kellyanne Conway Edition

At this point, the Trump Administration has stopped pretending that they’re not going to do a real-life reenactment of George Orwell’s 1984. At least we have Kellyanne Conway’s pleasant, albeit vapid intonations to lead us into our future dystopia. Our favorite crispy-fried Stepford Wife appeared on Meet the Press this past weekend to attempt the impossible: explain why her sociopathic orangutan boss was so obsessed with the size of his – crowd. From CNN:

“In an interview on NBC’s ‘Meet the Press,’ host Chuck Todd pressed Trump senior adviser Kellyanne Conway about why the White House on Saturday had sent Spicer to the briefing podium for the first time to claim that ‘this was the largest audience to ever witness an inauguration, period.’

‘You’re saying it’s a falsehood. And they’re giving — Sean Spicer, our press secretary — gave alternative facts,’ she said.”

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Oh bless your heart, Kellyanne – are you actually starting to believe the crazy shit that is flying out of your mouth? As Chuck Todd rightly pointed out, “alternative facts” is just a fancy way of saying:

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Maybe check out the Merriam-Webster definition of a word before you try to use it. Or just, you know – try not to lie so much.

Photo Credits: GiphyGIF Sec, Reaction GIF

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